District 204 Social Workers Support Parents Facing Child's Drug Problem

Pam Witt regularly gets calls from concerned parents. Sometimes when they call, they wish to remain anonymous and don’t want to identify their child. What they do want is to determine whether their child has a drug problem.

Witt, a licensed clinical social worker at , has no problem talking with concerned parents about a child’s possible drug use, regardless of whether they want to put everything out on the table or remain anonymous.  

“I don’t think I have had more calls [recently], but I have had steady calls all four years,” Witt said. “Parents will call … and will say this is what I’ve seen. After working with teenagers, it’s easier to know what falls into the normal range and what falls outside of that.”

The one key question Witt asks parents is: “Do you feel like it is becoming bigger than you?” If the answer is yes, she will help parents figure out whether counseling or a referral to a treatment program would be beneficial. 

Parents might call Witt and say their child is being secretive, has friends they don’t know, and they have noticed money missing or a credit card being used. 

Talking through those scenarios, Witt is able to help parents come to grips with what may be happening with a child and get help for the child and the family.

“Sometimes it's just helping parents get their heads around ‘well maybe they are experimenting with drugs,’” Witt said. “It’s a process. Maybe we get together and try and determine if they are using drugs and if they are, where are they in their use. If they are farther along in the drug use, maybe that means treatment.”

Denial and fear

Learning that a child has a problem with drugs is hard for a parent to hear, but Witt said kids can recover and it doesn’t have to become their identity. 

The key is taking the step to determine if there is a problem, she said. The social workers are there to help families to the degree they want help. That might mean helping parents find a treatment center that accepts their insurance or finding the right counselor for a child. 

Whatever a family requires, Witt said the social workers are there to help.

Some parents are in denial, which is usually a response based on fear, Witt said. But, recent have helped to educate families. 

Often it is a “chicken or an egg” situation, where a child may either start out suffering from anxiety or depression and then begin using drugs, or in other cases, starts out using drugs and then becomes depressed or anxious, Witt said.

An ongoing process

Witt is the social worker for the Neuqua Valley Class of 2012. She said in some cases when a parent contacts her, she may already know something about their student or have a relationship working with the student. If a meeting is set up with a student, she said it is not unusual for them to deny what is going on. If they do open up and say they are using, then steps can be taken immediately to get a child into treatment.

Getting to that point is an ongoing process that often takes time and monitoring, Witt said.

The best thing parents can do is to have repeated conversations about drugs with their children starting in elementary school, Witt said. But, parenting is hard and parents can’t be with their children at all times. 

“It’s much easier to do that hard work right away,” Witt said.

Parents need to monitor what their children are doing, she said, adding that parents need to have a relationship with their kids. Witt said parents and children need to have a mutual respect and an open dialog, which should span many years and include being open to talking about their life and concerns.

For parents who are afraid to ask for help, Witt said: “Please, please, please don’t be embarrassed and think you have to be alone and not know what to do. I am there to help their son or daughter and to help them get the help. There are four of us here to help.”

Signs parents can look for if they think their child might be using drugs:

• Taking money from a parent’s wallet
• Using a parent’s credit card
• Pawning things
• Spending a lot of a parent’s money and asking for more
• Moodiness and anxiety—while many teens are like this, there can be a correlation between this behavior and drugs
• Sneaking out at night
• Sudden change in friends
• Grades begin to slip; children cannot keep up their grades and won’t do homework