I bought my own first car when I was 22. 1972 Opel GT, bright orange. Looked like a little Corvette. Drove it from Chciago to California through the southern states, up to N. California and back to Chicago thru the northern states. I loved that car...right up until my then-wife totalled it.
No, I wouldn't buy my teen a car. If a teen wants one, they can save for it.

Add me to the "no one every bought me a car!" group!

My daughter is 18 and the two of us share my car. I'll be honest, if I could afford it I would probably buy her one of her own. She has a part-time job and I work full time. Sometimes our schedules just make it so hard to juggle the car keys.

She'll go back to college in August, and she isn't even allowed to have one there, so I guess it would be kind of silly to spend all that money for when she's home on breaks. I just know we are going to have one long, annoying summer, transportation-wise.

I think once my son is driving in earnest, if there are too many conflicts we may have to re-consider, but I'll fight it as long as possible. And, if there is a second car in our family, it sure won't be his! And he'll have to ask for it just like the one we have now.

My first car was a used Dodge Daytona. I think the air conditioning worked maybe the first month or two I owned it. My brother, looking out for his little sister - I think - bought it for me, but the payments were mine to make. The car lasted several years. My next car (a Ford Probe - always hated that name) I drove all over the country and had the transmission rebuilt. It died in 2006, and that is when I bought my first new car.

Oh, Mary Ann, I always hated that Ford name, too. They say it was meant to appeal to women, but that just makes it sound creepier!

First of all, you have "chosen" to live here. It sounds like you knew the "culture" of Naperville, (which is similar to many, many other cities and towns), and you chose to live here despite that. I really dislike it when people choose to live here and then bash it, and the people here. And I'm sure you'll rebut this, but you are inferring a few things about other parents who are making decisions different from yours. By inferring these things, your class envy is showing. Envy is very counter productive. My father used to tell us, "It's not polite to count other people's dollars." He was a wise man. We all need reminders to focus on what we're doing, not others, particularly if it doesn't affect you. There are always going to be people who have more, and those that have less. That's life. However, the people in Naperville are raising fantastic, successful kids, and keeping things in perspective. The kids are modelling themselves after their parents by way of philanthropy and valuing education. These kids are the ones who are positioned to be helping others tomorrow. Naperville is not perfect, no place is. But we have great citizens, superb teachers, city leadership that listens to us and cooperates with each other, and kids who achieve, and for the most part seem happy (at least as happy as teens will let you think they are!). Time for everyone to mind their own business, and count their own dollars.

No Sentinel, there is a method of writing that enables you to infer things about others while not coming right out and saying them, and the author here has mastered that. She's implied that other people's kids have been "given" cars, have access 24/7 and didn't "earn" them. She couldn't possibly know all that, but the inference is that those kids for whatever reason, shouldn't have them. And yes, when you state in an article that your response to someone else's kid having a car is "your freaking kidding me", you are guilty of envy. And there is no "disaster" response here, just a distaste for people implying things about others to make themselves look or feel good. Adults usually grow out of that. And no, I've had a rather splendid day, I was able to leave work early and enjoy the beautiful weather here in Naperville.

I agree with Sentinel. Nowhere in this article did I get any impression the author was bashing Naperville. She was just pointing out how kids are given things more and more and don't earn them. Being GIVEN a car is over the top, in my opinion, too. If you look for an implication, you're going to find it in any writing. You can say that about the Bible. There are many that take it literally, but there are also many that don't. You can read into "anything". I think you're way off on this one Jennifer. I've lived in Naperville since 1958 and seen a lot of chances. Not all good, not all bad. I couldn't care less what you have, where you live, or how much money you make. I don't like you for what you have, I like you for who you are. My daughters both got cars at 16. Guess what... THEY bought them.. not us. They had to gas them, and insure them, too. What a concept. It's called responsibility. No money for gas, so sad you can't go out tonight.
I CHOOSE to live here... does that make me a snot? I don't think so. Let me tell ya, there are plenty of them here though... as there is EVERYWHERE. If you seek them out, you will find them. I choose NOT to seek them out and try to be nice to everyone until they give me good reason not to. So what.
Class envy... get a grip.

Kota, you've just proven my point. You're implying that kids who are given cars are missing the "concept called responsibility". That's what the author here is intimating as well, that kids who are given cars are going to grow up without knowing responsibility, and as much as you may wish, it's not true. Times have changed, and we all live differently. There are so many other things to be focused on that will advance society, but counting other people's dollars, and judging their decisions as parents, is not one of them.

Janice, I appreciate your response, but I'd be very careful about perpetuating the current class envy that's permeating the country. It's destructive and non-productive, and I believe it also makes things worse for the kids involved. We're in an affluent community with a lot to offer. We're lucky we still have such a large tax base of residents who are employed and are able to pay the taxes to provide the things that we all enjoy. We need to be grateful, not envious. Not everyone lives the same way, and it's no reason to believe that someone else's teen is somehow less than somebody else's because they are given a means of transportation. Many Napervillians aspire to the "to whom much is given, much is required" philosophy. Most willingly seek places where they can help, realizing they possess an abundance. I assure you, in short time, the kids will move beyond this, I only wish the parents would take a cue from the kids. I happened upon this blog from a link when I was searching for something for work. While I'm not going to go back and read anything else, I surely hope that more articles are celebrating the achievements of the graduates, even warning parents of current dangers, but certainly not judging anyone else's lifestyles. As my Dad said, "It's not polite to count other people's dollars". It also does nothing to get you where you want to go!

My older sister was given a brand new car when she turned 16. It turned out fine, but she never took great care of it. Her best friend was also given a car, and he wrapped it around a telephone pole. Two other kids were killed in that accident, and that boy has never walked again. Does that happen in a lot of cases to inexperienced drivers? Not to that extreme. Is it something parents should be concerned about? YES!

My parents changed their methods by the time I was 16. I had to work, save up, and buy my own car -- and pay for gas, insurance, and repairs. I was so jealous! I did work, and I got a car at 16 - and paid every dime! It was an old beater. They could have helped me get a better car, but their goal at that time was to make sure that I valued the car as a result of my very hard work. And I did. I took really, really good care of it because I knew how much work it was to buy it and to maintain it. I drove it carefully. Now, decades later and as a parent myself, I see the wisdom in my parents' choice. There are a lot of things I value that I might not have otherwise. Their way is not the only way to do it, but I'm really glad my parents taught me the lessons they did. That has translated into so much more than a car with a big bow ever could have. It has nothing to do with money; it taught me responsibility like nothing else could have. I didn't get my car as a result of good grades or "helping out." That was expected. I worked for it. And I appreciate the lesson.

Nancy.... YES!!

Jennifer -- You seem to be the one counting all the dollars as you've said it so many times.
Kayla -- You sound like a very responsible parent. Thank you for instilling values in your children. Your parents were also very wise to realize acknowledge what happened and fix it. How hard that must have been on them.

Nancy, I am making no presumptions about what anyone else possesses or how they choose to spend their money. It's none of my business, which was my point to begin with. People need to worry about themselves, not what others are buying for their own kids. And I don't know about you, but I've lived here a long time, and have never been accused of being a snob. And frankly, I work in Chicago and encounter people from all over the area daily, and when they find out I live in Naperville, they are very complimentary about the city. And Kota, where did I even refer to anyone else's financial situation? I'm very careful about that as I think some people take it too far, and are far too nosy about those things. The author's comment about kids in Naperville having their own cars, having 24/7 access, and not "earning" them, just conveys a message of judgment. It's time for everyone to pay attention to their own decisions, and not worry about the decisions of others, we all live differently, make our own decisions, and no one way is correct. I'd like to carry on the conversation, but I have to get up early for work, as I'm sure we all do! I hope this blog continues the work of keeping parents up to date on safety issues, and the article about the Valedictorian, Sabrina Lichon, should be inspirational to all parents and students. Bravo to her! She is a fine example of what parents in Naperville do best, raise great kids!!

Jennifer, your defensive and prolific reaction to a perfectly innocent article is breathtaking. Do you often wear your politics so blatenly on your ample sleeves? Perhaps you consider it your duty to be on the lookout for the creeping stain of one-car family socialism. Whatever the case, I would agree with an early poster: lighten up.

Jennifer - Are you IMPLYING that we all have to work??
I do agree with you on one thing.... Naperville does raise some great kids! It's a great town... I've seen it go from approx. 10,000 people to what it is today. Of course it's not a perfect town. There is no perfect town. Naperville has a fair share of crime and other problems. A lot of which goes unreported because of WHO it is. But overall, it's a great town.

Jeff, no need to throw insults. Have you read the article? The implications are clear. And politics has nothing to do with any of this, it's a matter of people minding their own business. How many cars you, or anyone else owns is your business, not mine or anyone else's. The same with the manner in which someone else raises their children. And I do approach things with a light heart and clear mind. It's all perspective. Have a good one, Jeff, it looks to be another beautiful day, we're very fortunate!

Jeff, I agree with Jennifer on only ONE thing...there's no need for any insults here.

I HAVE read the article more than once and there are no "clear" implications...except to Jennifer, which is fine. Nobody is going to change her mind.

Janice...you just keep on writing what you write. It's YOUR column and they are YOUR opinions.

Have a very nice day...ALL.

Wow! These comments have been fun to read! First of all, Jennifer, methinks thou dost protest too much. I for one have misgivings about having bought my son a car when he was 17. I don't think he appreciates it that much and doesn't take very good care of it. I think Janice's point is that it might not be the wisest idea to buy your teenaged kid a steel death trap.

I do think that if you are going to buy your kid a car, you should buy the safest one you can afford. Notice I didn't say the hottest car. Both my older teens have totaled one of our cars but walked out unscathed. The safety features in late model cars save lives, so get them if you can. Better yet, get yourself a nice safe new car and occasionally let the kids drive it!

Finally, although Janice is very opinionated (I love that about you!), she routinely seeks the input of other parents on a variety of issues. I think we all stand to gain from this exchange of ideas.

Just had lunch with a colleague who filled me in that this site is owned by AOL, that says a lot. Mary, what we did or didn't do as far as cars for our now grown children, is no one's business but ours. From the looks of the commenters here, most are trolling, and the comments left on the story of the 18 and 19 year olds who tragically died are disgraceful. Everyone will parent differently until the end of time, nothing you can say will change that. After reading the comments by the author last night, and her past articles on the train this am, she has some issues with kids in Naperville and what they are "given". In a past article she sited some kids even have iPhone4's. Again, what business is it of yours? Unless they are harming you, everyone is entitled to parent the way they choose. Give up on the who has what stuff, it only diminshes your message.

You didn't know the site was owned by AOL? Reaaaaaaaaaally. And what does that say? That people that post on here are liberal because it's owned by AOL? There is a bit of difference between an iPhone and a car, too. And you are right, it's nobody's business who has what -- until it affects someone else. Buying a 16 year old a car shows me irresponsibility as a parent. What exactly is that teaching them? Gimmie Gimmie? Unfortunately, a phone has become a necessity .. very unfortunate. A car - not so much.

I will say this for you Jennifer, and I truly mean it - you have been very classy with your words and comments. And I mean that in a good way. Never insulting, just opinionated - which is your right. I know I tend to get sarcastic.. guess that's my right, too. Seriously Jennifer, you chose your words well and get your point across without getting nasty or mean. I applaud you.

Janice, no need to wrack your brain, I found your comment on this site in one of your past blogs you directed me to. My point, which is getting lost is, we should not be judging another parent about a decision they make for their family, unless it impacts us directly. We're not walking in their shoes. And we should no more be judging someone on what they purchase for their kids, or based on their financial situation, anymore than we would their religion, nationality, gender, sexuality, etc. I get the feeling that some people, perhaps not you, but some people, conclude, (maybe even hope), that kids who grow up with a lot of "things" will grow into brats and failures as adults. It doesn't work that way. I know four kids who grew up with a lot of "things", and grew into four of the most successful, caring, compassionate young adults you'll meet. (And there are thousands and thousands of them.) And they would never judge anyone based on their financial situation. They weren't raised that way. They were taught to evaluate others based on their essence. That thinking has freed them up to get to know all kinds of people, and has probably contributed to their success and compassion for others. While our kids will have many challenges ahead, the one thing that has bypassed this generation is being judgmental. They take each other for who they are. That mindset, and being raised in a caring, loving home, will ensure their success.

Jennifer, I merely meant that I couldn't remember which of my columns included mention of iPhones. Never once did I say that the kids who have a lot of things will grow into brats and failures. Not once.

My point is that I believe 16-year-olds are too young to have unlimited access to cars. I could be convinced that they are too young to drive at all. Ample research indicates that the teen brain does not mature until at least 25. In teens with issues like ADHD, brain maturity may lag by as much as 10 years. It is simply a fact that teens don't have the same judgement skills that adults do. When teens are behind the wheel it affects everyone on the road at the same time, it doesn't matter how the teen got the car.

In addition, I believe that children place more value on the things that they earn themselves. Even when my son has been rewarded for behavior, grades, etc., he values the things he bought himself--his drums, his guitars, his iPod Touch--far above anything he's been given. Earning does not have to mean money. My daughter is justifiably proud of a particular run she did with me despite bad weather and the length of the run.

I know we agree that being raised in a caring, loving home is the best insurance that children will be successful in life, whether that ultimately is measured in wealth or less tangible rewards.

Janice, I did not say you wrote that kids with access to "things" grow into brats. But we have encountered it before. And if you're going to start down the path of teen drivers, you'll need to address older drivers who mistake the gas for the brake, and those driving with impairments. That's why they have regular testing schedules. We have no choice but to leave the evaluation process to the experts. They are trained to know who should have driving privileges. Your beliefs are your own, based on your way of life, just as are everyone else's. I'm only hoping that you, and others will think twice before concluding that those "given" things don't value them, or that when kids are given even "brand new cars", there are no restrictions on their access, or no rules in place. It's your opinion column, you certainly are free to write what you think, but I'd caution you to be careful about making assumptions or judgments about other parents decisions. Remember, opinions are just that, not always factual. You don't have access to their personal information, as everyone is entitled to their privacy. As parents we need to question the kids about what they are doing, and touch base with other parents when parties are planned, etc., to be sure there is adequate supervision,etc., but the judging of another parents decision adds no value to anything. It is akin to gossip, which I know we all discourage our kids from doing.

Janice, I have an idea. Why not have Jennifer write your columns for you? Then Jennifer can be sure that everything agrees with her. She seems to be telling you what to write anyway.
Personal experience...I know many teens who EXPECTED their parents to give them a car as soon as they get their license and many of the parents gave in to them, whether the kid actually needed a car or not. Do that enough times and you better believe the kid just nmight develop an off-kilter sense of value later in life. Same goes for the new "it does everything" phones, if you want to include them. Oh, and as far as voicing your opinion goes...you do not have to look at everything from all sides to form one. You can base it on what you see and how you feel about certain issues. You write a column, not a thesis on society and, as you've said LONG before, it does appear in the "OPINION" section. Keep on keeping on.
See? I'm not a liberal at all...just realistic.

Jennifer has managed to engage quite a few people in an ongoing discussed based solely on her assumption about what Janice inferred when Janice wrote about topics she never wrote about. “It sounds like you knew the “culture” of Naperville and you chose to live here despite that.” How does Jennifer know Janice chose to live in Naperville despite her negative impressions of its culture?“You are inferring a few things about other parents who are making decisions different from yours.” Janice said nothing about other parents. She merely stated discomfort with the decision of some parents anywhere to provide their teens with cars. “By inferring these things, your class envy is showing.” Since Jennifer can’t prove that Janice inferred either of the assumptions made so far, it can’t follow that she is also guilty of “class envy.” For Jennifer to assume Janice is envious she would have to conduct an audit of Janice’s possessions and have been present during all the times Janice disparaged those of another class. Jennifer next launches a diatribe against Janice for counting other people’s dollars,” which she did not do, and for disparaging Naperville’s citizens, teachers and city leadership, which she also did not do. Jennifer scolds Janice for not minding her own business. Jennifer: It's an opinion column, not a memoir.By the way, these 6 assumptions appeared in the first of the 9 comments Jennifer has offered so far. I can hardly wait for the next.

Whoa there Kayla, if you read with care, you'll see I said the comments left on the article were digraceful. And some of them were. The ones left as a tribute were appropriate, I would never deny anyone the chance to mourn. But some of them were not respectful. Then the Patch closed the comments section because it was so bad. You are way off the mark on this one.

Kayla, no worries. My comments were regarding the kids who were killed the other day in the accident with the truck. The families and friends are grieving terribly, and the comments left on that page were awful. It went on most of the day apparently before someone from the Patch finally intervened and stopped the comments. I'm opinionated, but I have a big heart. Have a good one!

And this thread to has run it's course.
Jennifer - despite th fact that our opinions are on opposite ends, I believe you are a kind hearted and good parent who only wants what is best for the children. This thread has run it's course and we all just need to agree to disagree.
Have a great day.

Gee Jennifer, I guess the Patch DIDN'T "intervene" and stop the comments. I received notice of a new one from Mary this morning. It's possible, though, that people just stopped commenting, at least for a while. I don't think the Patch intervenes unnless comments start being horrible, off color, etc. It doesn't matter since, per you, you're "done now'. And so am I. Good day.

Gee Sentinel, if you read more carefully, you'll see that I was referring to the accident involving the three young adults who died tragically in the accident with the truck the other day. It was my first time on this site, and I was appalled that the nasty comments on THAT article, not THIS one, went on for as long as they did. And I know I wasn't the only one. I think the family and friends of those young adults have been tortured enough.

No, I did not leave comments on that board, I e-mailed the Patch directly, as did many others. And yes, that was a much more dire board, especially to the families and friends of the young adults who passed. And no, I won't be meeting you here, it's not my "thing". But if you're 3/4 blind, and you're doing this well on these boards, you're an inspiration!

Sentinel: This idea may help you with your posts. Open a word processing application like Microsoft Word. Type in the comment you intend to post. Run a spelling & grammar check under the Review tab. Highlight the entire comment. Cut and paste (or copy and paste) your comment to Patch. It will not catch all errors, and obscure punctuation symbols may not translate perfectly, but it offers the advantage of a larger window to see your post before you submit it to Patch.